"The Lord of the Rings" and Our Longing for Virtuous Masculinity

Bernard Hill died a few days ago. And man, that just gutted me.

​For those who do not know Bernard Hill, he was a British actor who is most famous for playing King Theoden in The Lord of the Rings and the captain of the Titanic in the movie Titanic. 

King Theoden is certainly his most beloved character. After news of Hill's passing hit the interwebs, people everywhere posted scenes of King Theoden marshalling his small, demoralized kingdom to fight (and die) against the vast legions of Mordor. "Spears shall be shaken! Spears shall be splintered! A sword day, a red day, and the sun rises!" 

It's an amazing scene. Really gets the blood pumping.

​The Lord of the Rings, like all good movies, continues to pop up in the national conversation over the last 20 years. The timelessness of themes like duty, friendship, honor, patriotism and sacrifice for a greater good resonate. The story acted as a balm when America recovered from 9/11. The dialogue between Frodo and Gandalf (taken word-for-word from Tolkien's original book) where Frodo laments the horrors he is witnessing circulated widely during the pandemic of 2020. 
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Nowadays people are mulling over the crisis in masculinity. Men have been judged so poisonous and dangerous that women online have overwhelmingly said that if faced with a man or a bear in the forest, women would rather confront the bear. The consensus online is that men are more likely to be harmful towards women than bears. 

The "Man vs. Bear" debate is a bit tongue-in-cheek. Speaking as someone who hikes a great deal and has encountered both men and bears in the woods, I prefer men. Bears don't get scared if you threaten to call 911. Also, truth be told, most male hikers I meet usually just say "good morning" while the one bear I encountered literally growled at me. 

Of course the debate of Man v. Bear isn't about the literal woods but the wider social tilt towards toxicity when it comes to desirable masculine traits. The 2020s have seen the rise of "Redpill" podcasters, young men who purposely invite young women onto their podcasts in order to publicly humiliate the women. Andrew Tate, an influencer who celebrates beating, controlling and assaulting women, has a cult-like following among his male audience. Harrison Butker, an NFL quarterback and commencement speaker at Benedictine College, mocked the female graduates listening to him. He told the women that they had been victims of "the most diabolical lies" and that women should refrain from being proud of the degrees they obtained after four years of study and the "promotions and titles you're going to get in your career" because "I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited about your marriage and the children you will bring into this world." 

Marriage rates have tumbled and Gen Z women now talk about going "boysober" (aka celibate) because of the intolerable shift towards nastiness among men. 

This bitter, rage-filled definition of masculinity that has become so entrenched in American culture stands in stark contrast with the portrayal of masculinity in The Lord of the Rings. In The Lord of the Rings, masculinity is defined by self-sacrifice. Tolkien's work elevates fighting and dying for a cause, whether it be a kingdom, a destiny or even the entire future of the known world.

Masculine self-sacrifice in The Lord of the Rings, however, is not an individual effort. No one character in Tolkien's work is able to make a victory without the close coordination of many other people. This necessity of fellowship is also the linchpin in Peter Jackson's movie adaptation. Aragorn is Gondor's true king returned, but he cannot succeed without King Theoden, Gimli, Legolas and Gandalf working with him. Frodo may be the Christ-like figure forced to bear the burden of the One Ring, but he cannot succeed without Sam helping him every step of the way.

And of course Sam and Frodo cannot succeed in destroying the One Ring without the armies of Gondor distracting Sauron's eye outside of Mordor's interior.​

American masculinity depends on the lone individual saving the day against all odds. Only one man is the hero so frankly only one man deserves the praise. This view of masculinity implies that if a man's heroism is dependent on other men's heroism assisting him, then that man is not masculine in any positive sense of the word. 

If heroism is dependent on fellowship and not individuality, then that necessitates that masculine heroism involves a minimum level of empathy. You can't have others fight and die by your side if you're unwilling to show empathy towards them. Aragorn is willing to fight and die with King Theoden at Helm's Deep despite Aragorn having no real duty towards Theoden. Theoden is willing to fight and die to help Gondor despite Gondor having abandoned Rohan earlier when Rohan was attacked by Saruman's forces. Sam sticks by Frodo with a fierce and unambiguous love that has touched readers for decades. 

The version of masculinity seen in The Lord of the Rings is a version that is dependent on empathy. Every line in the film soars high above the sneering condescension that passes for masculine virtue in 21st century American culture. We can go back to Harrison Butker, who said in his reviled Benedictine College commencement address: I think it is you the women who have had the most diabolical lies told to you. .. I can tell you that my beautiful wife Isabelle would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation as a wife and as a mother.... As men we set the tone of the culture and when that is absent disorder, dysfunction and chaos set in. This absence of men in the home is what plays a large role in the violence we see all around the nation. Be unapologetic in your masculinity, fighting against the cultural emasculation of men. 

Butker's words cannot be more different than King Theodens's dialogue in the scene in The Return of the King where Theoden talks to his daughter Eowyn before he departs to fight in the war against Mordor. "The people are to follow your rule in my stead," he says,  "Take up my seat in the Golden Hall. Long may you defend Edoras."

"What other duty would you have me do my lord?"  Eowyn asks sadly. Her world is crumbling around her. She is being left behind to die with the women and children while those she loves ride off to war. 

"Duty?" Theoden replies, "No. I would have you smile again. Not grieve for those whose time has come. You shall live to see these days renewed. No more despair." 

Theoden showing respect for his daughter's leadership while also sincerely wishing for her happiness is extraordinarily different from Butker's mocking of female professional leadership and condescending assurances that female happiness only comes through serving men. The character of Theoden beautifully shows the virtuous masculinity that is sorely needed in our culture now.

RIP Bernard Hill. You will be missed.